If I say Switzerland, what does the
name represent to you as far as countries go? What are your thoughts as to how
the country is run and its people? Are the thoughts that come up for you
aspirational or uninspired or neutral?
When you look at Switzerland today, you would not think that it was a
country almost torn apart by a Civil War, as a result of people that could not
tolerate each other for their differences. How did the country navigate through
that historical ethnic conflict, to get to where they are today?
Stephen R. Covey, in his book The 3rd
Alternative, illuminates research done by Professor Carol L. Schmid. “In her
study of countries with major ethnic divides, Schmid observes that successful
ethnic coexistence is dependent on a significant amount of equality between
groups…. Tensions are likely to be aggravated by an awareness of significant inequalities
among ethnic groups.”
Reading this, you must be thinking the
research is stating the obvious. So how is it then that in South Africa today,
so many years past 1994, we still have the majority of people in the country, “the
have nots”, feeling inferior to the minority, “the haves”? How do we expect to
have no tension if people have a perception of inequality purely based on the
ethnic group they belong to?
As people we all want respect, and
this mind-set of people having to earn respect is probably the biggest flaw in
the flow of things. Respect should be given, the minute you don’t respect
people, you dehumanise them. How different would your life’s experience be if
you actually saw people when dealing with them, rather than just going through
a mechanical process or routine?
I am assuming you see yourself as a
person and therefore your behaviour does portray your human qualities.
Sometimes the problem is as simple as people not seeing themselves as human
beings, as then you can’t expect them to see others as such. If you see yourself as a person, then why can’t
you see the other person as a human being as well? Acknowledge that person and
see them as more than just another thing, no matter how different they seem to
you. Another person being different from you does not make them any less a
human being than you!
What would be your life’s experience if
you greeted people when you came into their presence, without using some form
of ranking system to determine whether you greet or not? What would be your
life’s experience be if you actually respected the other person enough to at
least learn how to pronounce their name properly, rather than rebranding them,
or asking them if they have a name that is easier to pronounce or a short
version of their name that you could use?
It’s a small beginning to solving a
big problem. For me, if you cannot make an effort to call someone by their
name, and instead choose to call them by what you are comfortable with, you
have chosen to be more important as a person as compared to the other person.
You have effectively opted to engage a derivative (possibly diminutive) of the
other person as you have changed their identity to suit you. In so doing your
inclination might naturally be to treat that person as less than you.
Your name is your identity, so stop
changing other people’s identity and see them for who they truly are!
Related
Articles:
You can follow Thabo Hermanus on twitter, http://twitter.com/fit4thabo
No comments:
Post a Comment